Y’all want to know what’s painful? Post baby shopping. There’s nothing glamorous or flattering about it. It’s hard and sweaty and somewhere caught between a comedy reality show slash American ninja warrior.
Fun fact: one time while post-baby shopping I got stuck in a shirt. I’m not talking like, oh this is a little snug. I’m talking full on sweat, arms will not even make it around to try and remove this shirt. I’m talking so stuck I had to rip said shirt off and pay for a shirt that not only was ripped but wouldn’t even fit if I got it fixed.
Mistake number 1: having the semi-rational thought of “oh surely this will fit!” Don’t you do it.
You know what else is painful? Swim suit shopping. Pre or post baby, it’s just...an unfortunate situation to find yourself.
But this year, in my newfound season of “my kids won’t remember a clean house,” I’ve also decided that my kids, ALONG WITH THE REST OF THE WORLD, will not remember what swim suit I wore. Or my body type. Or the incredible number of stretch marks that showed up with baby #4, and the large portions of white flesh that don’t seem to tan no matter how hard I try.
In the grand scheme of things that matter, there is great news for all of us in that swim suit readiness doesn’t. So get up off the sidelines, stop debating and spending too much time in the mirror deciding if it makes your butt look big and just embrace the rest of summer; throw on whatever the heck swim suit you want and know that one day when its your time to leave this earth no one will stand around at your funeral and remember you for your swim suit.